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6h ago

love dilemma
i`m in a real big dilemma.there`s this guy who thinks that we`re dating i like him as a friend only coz he doesnt have what i want in a man&he isn`t who i want either.i dont know how to tell him&i cant break his heart again.about a year ago we used to kinda date&i ended it coz i didn`t like him at all&i still dont.i left him for another guy who i thought i liked but i left him too coz i met the man of my dreams,he was absolutely amazing&he made me so happy.all good things come to an end i know,the one i gave my heart to just broke it in pieces.he did the most unforgivable thing but i still luv him&i cant get over him.i could take him back if i wanted but it would be unethical but at the sametime it would make me content.the guy who thinks i`m dating him which i`m not kept in touch&wanted me till this time&he could never amount to my lost luv.i feel empty without him&it hurts to see him knowing his no longer mine.money cant buy luv no matter what mountain the other guy will climb i`ll never luv him.if i dont have who i want then i dont want anyone at all.i know i should go to the one who luvs me&not the one i luv but should i follow my heart or my head?i`m in a love dilemma i need to know coz i might let the love of my life pass me by.
Answer 371 views
Expert
CyberShrink
cybershrink

01 Jan 0001

Dear cofused,
Funny, isn't it, how you can forgive the guy who hurt you so much, and you still carry such a crush on Him Who Has GOne, that you can't invest in another relationship, even if it could be more satisfying. Your "lost love" is just that ---LOST. he has already passed you by. But he is NOT "the love of your life", he just felt like that for a while. The love of your life you haven't met yet.
Can you talk calmly wit this other, nice, guy and explain that after being so hurt you're not ready for any serious love relationship just now, but would appreciate it if he could just be a friend, and be around when you need his support or advice --- but that you won't be getting into a closer relationship with him. Make it clear that this isn't because there is anything wrong with him, but because of your own issues.
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