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24 Nov 2005

Love was never mine.
I truely loved her when I married her.
I tried in every way I knew to show her.
She deceived me by making a day time appointment with her ex lover.
I loved her and forgave her without finding out why she was still meeting with this guy. (Perhaps the truth would have been too much for me.)
I found semen on her panties after 5 years into our marraige. I loved her and wanted to believe that it was a meaningless quicky. She ofcourse denied the forensic analysis that it was semen. I accepted that and did not pursue the matter because I loved her.
13 years into our marraige I found out that she was friends with another man. I forbad her the friendship after I found out that it was becoming very unhealthy and secretive. They met each other behind my and this man wife's backs.
They kept on with their meetings and when I wanted to pursue the matter I was forbidden to mention it. I loved her and accepted the ban on any discussion of the matter.
I loved her but found that this savage cut was ultimately fatal.
I could not forgive and forget again ....... And the expression of love died.
We lived together for another seven years, without fighting and or bickering, but also without any real communication. I preferred it this way because seperation was unthinkable. I loved her.
Inevetably she has left me and we are only friends. I don;t want to be her friend.
Friendship cannot grow in my barren, cold. burnt out hart where love once flourished.
She was looking for love. She'll never find it. She can't recognize it if she sees it.
Bye my love. At one stage it was grand. Thank you.
Answer 412 views
Expert
CyberShrink
cybershrink

01 Jan 0001

Sadly, Chris, in the end you lost very, verty little. She will run into the problems her type of behaviour always ultimately cause. And you ned to let go and move on with the rest of your life, and make it a really good one.
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