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Question

03 Feb 2004

Need Advice
Hi there. Ive been dating this girl for almost 2 years of which we stayed together for a year, but I lost my job and we had to move back to our families. She didnt want to stay with my me with my parents. We are both finished with school and studies. Now that we are not staying together can I only see her on weekends. I dont know if she is not allowed or dont want to but its ridiculous. I really love her and want to spend time with her but its just impossible. I miss her too much just to see her on weekends. I tried to talk to her about it but she just start a argument. Her mother is very difficult and so is she. I tried to write her a letter and asked her to write 1 back but she ignored my letter and said she doesnt have time to write me 1. She told me she loves me and want me in her life but how can i believe it if she doesnt have time to write me a letter? And I really thought we are getting along so well when we stayed together so I went and bought her a nice white gold engagement ring and now she doesnt want to get engaged and she told she doesnt want to move back in with me for at least a year. What I can understand is that nothing so bad happened between us that she couldve changed her mind like this. Im tired of trying to be and make her happy. What must I do? How can I get through to her?
Answer 368 views
Expert
CyberShrink
cybershrink

01 Jan 0001

Dear HUH,
MMmmmm, it sounds as if she's leaving all the work of the relationship up to you, and as if, for whatever reason, ( maybe falling under much more of her mother's influence since returning home ) she is now cooling off somewhat on the relationship. You sound like a nice, caring and sincere fellow. I don't se how any of us can guess what's on her mind or what's happening. OK, so you two only get together on the weekeneds --- can't you spend a chunk of next weekend, not arguing, but calmly discussing what is happening and where your relationship is going ? You can't handle a situation well until you know exactly what it is.
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