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03 Feb 2008

Pregnant but not happy
I missed my two months periods, then decided to buy a home preg test it came out positive. I am depressed as my son is 1yr, how will he take it.Tried to talk to my husband about aborttion but he refused.

I made an appointment for monday, just to confirm. I will be happy if the gynae says the baby is not well. I cant cope with this pregnancy, iam not sick but when i think of it i cry without explanation to my husband.

I told him that we should go for councelling hoping that he will take the initative to make app with the councellor, but NO. He is not worried that i haven't been to the gynae yet. If i cancel my app ,he will not say anything.Is he also in the same state as im, or he just ignorant. After this pregnancy iam thinking of sterelization, not sure if its a good idea.I Live in PTA, please help me to find a councellor who will help me.
Answer 388 views

01 Jan 0001

I'm puzzled by what you are finding so alarming about this. WHy on earth are you assuming that your son of one would "take" your new pregnancy badly ? Why go to the extent of considering abortion, to avoid a risk to your son which just does not exist ? There is no reason to expect any form of harm to your son, and indeed he may well benefit from having a sister or brother close to his own age, as a companion as they grow up.
Now, I wonder whether you might be suffering from something like a PND ( Post-Natal Depression) following on from the last pregnancy, which may be distorting your view of this situation --- and you should seriously consider seeing a good local psychiatrist for a full asessment and advice on treatment if needed --- and CBT ( Cognitive-Behaviour Therapy ) is a highly effective treatment for depression that doesn't need drugs, and is entirely safe in pregnancy. The Anxiety/Depression Support Group ( number on these pages ) could help you find a suitable shrink in Pretoria, preferably one doing CBT. And as for thoughts of sterilization, again, never select a permanent solution for a temporary problem --- if you do have PND, after it is properly treated, you may think very didfferently about all this, so keep your options open.
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