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11 Aug 2010
I am not sure what is wrong with me, I am now having wishes to be raped by a man who is well build and muscular, I crave sex a lot, though I have a boyfriend, we have sex almost every second day. What can the course be, last weekend, I had this plumber fixing my bathroom tabs, and I just imagined him on top of me. Whenever my boyfriend sleeps with me, I wish that he can be rougher. He has done it once but never repeated it again I was never abused nor raped before. Whenever he leaves the house I watch pornographic movies. So I think the devil is using me I pray that it gets out of my mind!!! I tried to pray and curse it but no luck.
It would be wise for you to see a good local counsellor, soon, to work towards understanding better what is going on here. I don't think the devil is involved, but it sounds as though you have far too much spare time on your hands, and too little worthwhile to do other than indulging in sexual fantasies and watching pornography. Get other hobbies, get involved in community and charity work. Maybe consult a charity that works with women who have actually been raped, to remind yourself that rape is not the erotic fantasy you seem to be entertaining yourself with, but an ugly and painful thing
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