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07 Mar 2004
Rebilious as an adult!
I have a terrible problem with being really rebelious. I am very quiet and rarely speak up - but often at meetings (like bible study) I just feel so angry and 'otherwise' and I want people to know that I disagree with them. It's very illogical. I really try to submit and not be like this - but i just get 'angry' and rebelious all over again. What's wrong with me? Is my personality flawed? I'm in my mid-twenties and can't keep being this chidish!
In some ways, maybe everyone's personality is at least slightly flawed. t sounds as if you were probably brought up in a rather conservative family, in which you learned that you were supposed to "submit" to the views of others, and to suppress your own feelings and ideas. I wonder whether in your regular way of life, you keep to these principles, which can be enormously frustrating, as we're all entitled to have our own point of view, and to be heard and taken into consideration. And then, maybe in a safe setting like bible study, this inner anger, built up aout other events and with far better reasons, bubbles over just because you feel relatively safe there, and feel more justified in "having your say" and in disagreeing. Sometimes the feelings and emotions aroused in one setting where it isn't practical or best to express them, get transferred to other settings, and spill out there.
Anyone else have ideas here ?
Anyone else have ideas here ?
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