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Question

05 Aug 2007

relationshipp
hi, have been on off with boyfriend for 5 years of which the past 2 have been fairly consistent.
it started with him not being honest and still seeing previous girl. he was pretty messed up over a divorce in 1999.
he hits the roof when i try to discuss our future and says that i pressurise him and am cunning. and if i so badly want a husband and babies to go find a "puppy" who will jump when i snap my fingers.
we have been living together for only two months and he says that i am demanding and he will never marry me if i continue in this manner. i fear that this is an easy excuse for him to hide behind.

my parents and all my friends have taken years to warm to him, so i cannot talk to them for fear of the much dreaded "i told you so
" i am beginning to doubt my own integrity in this matter because most discussions end in screaming matches which makes me feel like a witch.
i am mid 30s and he is 41. my chidhood was very happy and loving, his was not so great. how does one know when a relationship is not healthy?
Answer 342 views
Expert
CyberShrink
cybershrink

01 Jan 0001

Sounds like he finds you convenient rather than loving you, and is comfortable to keep things as they are and wants to frighten you off from trying to expect anything more from him. What about this relationship seems healthy and promising to you ? I agree with Maria otherwise --- personal counselling could help you gain confidence and clarity
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