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03 Feb 2004

Should i continue being his friend
I met this guy about two years ago and the kind of friendship i have with him is different to any other guy friend i have. He has said things that indicated to me that he wanted more from me than just being his friend. Things however has changed with him, he doesn't say these things anymore but has not told me why things has changed. I have accepted it. But these days i feel that i am only good enough for him if there is nobody around. If his other mates are around he basically throws me to the dogs, i become non-existent. I am always there for him if things go wrong, when he has problems, when he needs to talk about things bothering him. But the times when i need to talk about the things happening/going wrong in my life it's like he is never there, or i tell him and it's as if he doesn't care...he will say nothing about what i told him. Whenever something has gone wrong in my life and i need to talk to somebody about it, it's like something will happen to him and then i have to be there for him. This is really draining me to the extent that i am too tired to deal with it anymore. Even though it is difficult, would it be wise of me to stop being his friend? To stop talking to him completely? stop being there for him? Or tell him that i have alot of things to sort out and i don't have the energy for him at the moment?
Any advice would be appreciated
thanks
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Expert
CyberShrink
cybershrink

01 Jan 0001

Sandy,
This sounds far too one-sided to be a genuine relationship, doesn't it ? He sounds like he's using you as a First Aid Kit / comforter / audience / and as company when nobody else is available. What's in it for you ? ou could just indicate to him that while you've been happy to be supportive to him, you feel too much like a spare tire now, and need someone who values you and cares for you yourself.
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