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Question

29 Nov 2005

Sick and tired
Hi there,

I have this problem and want to share it in order to see whether I am the one at fault here. Normally I will keep my problems to myself and only when approached by others will talk about it ie if they ask why I am so down etc. This proves to me that they are interested in my wel being or are they?

I am having a turbulance in my life at the moment and it is really hard to accept circumstances especially with my family. All I want is for them to understand what I am going through and show some kind of support. If they don't want to render support then don't ask me what is wrong.

I am sick and tired of hearing crap like "be glad you're still alive", "be thankful you don't have that disease", "it could have been worse", "what you're complaining about".....

You know what...ok so I am still alive and there is so much to be thankful for, but at this very moment in time I need support to get throughg MY problem. It frustrates me that people always throw this in your face. Even the Bible says there is a time for everything and maybe it is not the time to be judgemental. I don't care what others are doing or not. I need help now to get through my own problems so that I can see the light and then only can I be thankful that I am better off than others.

Don't ask what is wrong if you're not prepared to really suuport that person. Only if that person feel better you're entitled to point out the positives and negatives.

What is wrong with society today?

Thanks for allowing me to vent, at least I feel relieved on that aspect...

Answer 361 views
Expert
CyberShrink
cybershrink

01 Jan 0001

Often, people who really want to help, but have no idea of what would actally be helpful, fall back on those anodyne simplistic " Always darkest before the dawn" type of sayings, which can be so annoying even though they are well-meant. Rather than just getting cross because they're not being helpful, tell them what you want and need --- tell them HOW to be helpful, including perhaps a suggestion that just as taking your temperature every 5 minutes doesn't bring down a fever, so asking how you are every few minutes doesn't help you to feel better.
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