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18 Apr 2006

so the wheel turns...
Hi CS and everyone else,

Hope the weekend was good. I spent mine close to the ocean, did a lot of walking and thinking and healing..

CS, I'm back on the full 20mg Deparoc, and it's working. I'm very calm and it's as if things just 'fall in place', if I can call it that. Everything looks a bit clearer, feels like whatever happens needs to happen. Experiencing a bit of fuzzyness in my head, finding it difficult to remember small details, it is as if things happen and then it feels almost like it all was a dream? Anyway. It's fine. I'm coping so much better with my situation - which is great.

Went to see a 'shrink' - she's great. We discussed my relationship and what's been happening - she says it's definately abuse from bf's side, and that she can hear that I'm angry enough to let go and move on. The meds are also helping and I hope from the bottom of my heart that this time I'll be able to move on with my life.

He tried to take the show tickets away from me (we had tickets for the Robbie Williams show) and said that he'll give it to someone who will appreciate it.... (this now after the indicent where he went through pics of him and his ex - now the finacee of his brother - in front of me and after he told me to f-off out of his house after I said i'm not interested in seeing it...) I refused to give him the ticket and the morning of the show he called to say he'll go only to make me happy (so he can be the hero again). I was in a bit of a state and then wasn't as nice as it ought to have been, but under the circumstances I survived quite well.

So I went away for the weekend with my parents, and haven't seen him or spoken to him since Thursday night. He sms'd early Saturday evening to say he hopes I'm having a good time. I didn't reply.

I want to move on with my life.... I reallly and honestly hope that I'm going to succeed this time.....

Answer 337 views

01 Jan 0001

Hi Pencil -- sounds like a well-spent weekend ; pleased to hear of your progress. Sounds like you are ready to move on ; and as though he is tring to needle you, as he's unsure of how to deal with you when you are calm and self-assured. As well he should be !
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