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26 Jul 2005

Stepdaughter's medical problems
I know this is not Cyberdoc, but I seriously think my stepdaughter's problems are not medical, but rather psychological...

We see them every second weekend and one night during every week. She has been complaining about her "bladder being sore" for over three weeks now. Is this normal? I'm not sure if she has told her mother about the pain, or if she uses imaginary ailments to get attention. I just give her CitrusSoda when she complains, but I'm getting fed-up with this now.

I'm scared to jump to conclusions, just in case something is really wrong with the kid, but she also has a hypochondriac for a mother. I'm thinking she's picking up on her mother's attention seeking mechanisms and now she uses it at our house. She's forever complaining about something hurting! She usually complains about something or the other medically wrong with her within the first ten or fifteen minutes they arrive at our house. I'm really getting impatient with this now... Her mother had kidney stones removed in hospital around three weeks ago, and she has been complaining to us of bladder pain since her mother came out of hospital.

I don't know much about bladder and kidney problems, but would drinking more water not help?

I feel like phoning the mother and telling her that she must take the child to see a doctor and get this sorted out, but last time we did that, she exploded and told me to do it myself if it bothers me that much. She says it's not just her child, but my husband's too and he's medically responsible for them. I know that, yes, but he PAYS FOR THE CONSULTATIONS AND MEDS. Is that not what medically responsible means, or am I missing something here??

Anyway, had to vent...
Answer 380 views
Expert
CyberShrink
cybershrink

01 Jan 0001

hard to tell, of course, without more information than you could provide here. Little girls are rather vulnerable to urine / bladder infections, often arising for no obvious reason. If citrosoda helps her to feel comfortable, this suggests a bladder infection is posible.
On the other hand, yes, when a mother is a master at using illness / symptom complaints to attract attention, children can learn this bad habit from the mother.
Drinking more water can help in both types of urinary tract problem --- in bladder problems by diluting the urine it might help her feel a bit more comofortable ; and, as I was reminded on my single experience of a kidney stone agnizingly passing down the ureter, drinking much more water is advised, to help to prevent the formation of further stones.
Maybe if the mother is so wrapped up in her own complaints, she may ignore or neglect the child's symptoms, explaining why the child might save them up and report them to you when she visits. If your husband is paying for the consultations, etc., anyway, why not arange for her to see a good paediatrician during one of her visits to you ?
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