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28 Nov 2005

The ex is moving in with his mom!!!!!!!!!!!
Dear CS (and all that know me)
I'm so pissed right now, as I type this I'm fuming.
For the past 3 months my fiancees mom has been talking about letting his ex move in with her because they've always been quite close and she wants to get out of the abusive relationship she's in now. This was all just talk and it was only supposed to be decided next year March.

I just received a phone call from my fiancee saying that he's spoken to his mom and his ex is moving in TODAY! I think the reality of this whole thing has hit home because I'm so upset I feel ill!! It's not like this girl (18) is a threat to me, it's more of the fact that I'm concerned about how this is going to affect our relationship.

We always go for dinner at his mom, we sleep over there, we live about 10 kms from her. We visit on Sunday mornings etc. Now, the way I'm feeling I don't even want to speak to her on the phone!
The whole issue is that we've never met before and although I will get over it and am confident that as an adult (24) I will manage fine, it's how its going to make HIM feel seeing her for the first time since their break up 2 years ago. They left on bad terms, what if they still have feelings for each other? What if after 2 years it brings back memories? Where do I stand? Im so scared, I want to cry.

My fiancee has stressed he's not impressed with these arrangements and seems very upset. I've been acting all cool and calm but deep inside I'm scared as all hell.
Tonight we've been invited for dinner by his mom, like we're all supposed to sit down and have a meal like old bloody china's!??!

~Wings~

Answer 403 views
Expert
CyberShrink
cybershrink

01 Jan 0001

I thought I smelled fumes ! Really, it does sound daft and rude of the mom, and remarkably insensitive and thoughtless. It cannot be that this ex has no other alternatives on earth but this. Sounds like you are and will be handling this like an adult --- but maybe he and you should talk with his mom about the importance of making sure that this arrangement is brief and not long-lasting.
And maybe refusing to accept tonight's invitation will make a useful initial point. I lik Buzz's idea of inviting MiL to your place, instead.
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