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29 Nov 2005

Tired to be strong
I'm 37 and a mother of 3 teenagers. My daugther is 18, son 15 and youngest daughter 12. We are living with my fiancè. My eldest is leaving for University next year and the yougest wants to go and stay with her dad (200km) from me. She wasn't selected prefek at her school and now refuse to go back next year. I'm working 7 to 16H00 5 days a week. It's just that I'm so tired. Tired of allways being the strong one. I'm depressive and tired. I went through my divorce 3 years ago, also being the strong one. My daughters is leaving (I have to be strong again) I'm so so tired.
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Expert
CyberShrink
cybershrink

01 Jan 0001

I think the prefectorial system causes far more problems than it solves, giving some kids a premature sense of being god-like when they're in fact very ordinary. At a recent 40 year reunion at my old school, I met the former Head Prefect, who has done nothing very special in his life, but sailed in assuming everyone would be terribly impressed with him, and hardly noticed that nobody was. So it seems she is over-reacting terribly to not being chosen as prefect, which ought really to be something trivial in her life. Why cant someone talk some sense into her and let her see how little this matters, versus going to a new school where she will have no status at all and take ages to make new friends.
Good sense from other readers here. It sounds as though you've done a great job as a mom so far. Now it's their turn to be strong for themselves, and let you gain some strength and support from your fiancee.
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