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Question

04 Jan 2005

To any man that can enlighten me...
Hello all :0)

I would like some illumination on the subject of men. Specifically a mans mind.

Here's my dilemma: I have been with my boyfriend for almost 2 years now. We have a 4 month old son together and I just don't understand why he's still with me???

He's constantly telling me I'm ugly and fat and I'm too white and he doesn't like my hair etc etc....

He keeps telling me I'm not his type and he doesn't find me attractive.

So the other day I decided I couldn't take the criticism anymore and I left him. Now he's calling the whole time telling me I'm a (place obscene word here) and all sorts of things because I've broken his family appart.

I've explained that I can't love someone who doesn't love me, but he says we must stay together for the sake of our son.

Huh?????

PLease help understand his rationale!!
Answer 358 views
Expert
CyberShrink
cybershrink

01 Jan 0001

Fortunately, there is no such thing as "a man's mind", any mre than "a woman's mind". WHile each sex can show some similarities in some ways, the differences between us as individuals are always greater than those between us as genders. I doubt that there's anything rational in his nasty and rude behaviour. And of course you are not, fat, ugly, or anything else, because he chooses to say so. What you've done, as Q and Liza emphasize, is above all INCONVENIENT for him, disturbing his comfort, and maybe even embarrassing him. If he has any degree of sincerity in wahnting to think of the child and the relationship, maybe you should insist that he join you in FAMSA-style relationship / couple counselling FIRST, to see if things can be worked out compatibly. If not, stop taking his calls, and ignore him until he can be civilized and polite and communicate with your considerately.
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