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04 Dec 2012

Unfair husband
yesterday my husband bought me a bag, and 200 for hair, you know why, he was feeling guilty because he does not do anything for me I am working I know but I think a man should do his work and spoil his wife, you know why he bought them its because it is December and he has a daughter by another mother so he must buy for her. and another thing we have arranged an unveiling which I must assist, the other day he was telling me that I am not assisting him by anything and yet I am the one who assisted him to bury his father, I am paying school fee for the son, paying rates, and I always deposit a sum of R2500 to his account so that we can at least balance. I told him I dont want the bag and the money I will spoil myself because I can see that he was not doing it from the heart but feelilng guilty that what will I say when he takes the money and give to daughter and yet in the house we are nothing









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Expert
CyberShrink
cybershrink

01 Jan 0001

If man and wife are both working, shouldn't she sometimes "spoil" him as well ?
If he has a daughter by another mother, isn't it good that he should care enough about his daughter to get her something for Christmas ? Would you prefer it if he were the sort of man who ignores his responsibilities and his children ?
Sounds though, like you two have concerns and potential arguments about how to share family expenses as you both earn. These things are best discussed and agreed ; when one starts assuming that he or she "knows" they should pay for this or that, there are usually troubles ahead.
Maybe you were right here, but I'm uneasy that you ASSUMED he had bad motives for giving you the bag and the money - isn't it possible that he meant well ?
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