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15 Nov 2004

used?
What does it mean if someone is using you. My boyfriend stays with me over weekends - does this mean he is using me. He has now asked me to keep score at his cricket matches to get me involved - does this mean he is using me? We have bought a house together because on our own, we would never have got the bond - does this mean he is using me? I am getting different opinions from everyone - I need some kind of clarity on these issues.
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Expert
CyberShrink
cybershrink

01 Jan 0001

This doesn't sound much like "using". He stays with you over weekends --- is that miserably horrible for you and pure joy for him ? Or do you two enjoy parts of the weekend ? He suggests that you get involved with his cricket, and keep score --- is that bad ? Wouldn't it be more enjoyable for you to share some of his hobby of crcket, rather than have that area of his life ( perfectly reasonable to have a hobby ) completely separated from you ?
As Inc wisely says, the questions are different/ Does he care about you ? Does he take you for granted and always ignore what you want and how you feel, and think solely of himself ? Does he reasonably plan for this relatonship to contibnue and be happy for both of you ?
Buying a house together must mean a long-term committment to each other, or the financial and other problems would be large.
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