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Question
04 Apr 2006
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Waiting for the stars to fall.
I know I sometimes get like this, and you don't like it. Well I'm like that now and I don't expect you to like it.
Went back to class today. Wasn't too bad. Just have a lot to catch up on. Otherwise fine. That 'thing' has been absent up to now, just came once. As I suspected it's also reaching into my normal mind. Off the pot. Had a total sense of calm this morning as I drove to class. So peacefull. Feal like I can leave now and know there WILL in fact be people who will miss me. That's an amazing feeling. I'm totally lacking fear. Now I feel calm and determined. I will wait for this thing, and give myself to it. Completely. I am ready to go his way.
Went back to class today. Wasn't too bad. Just have a lot to catch up on. Otherwise fine. That 'thing' has been absent up to now, just came once. As I suspected it's also reaching into my normal mind. Off the pot. Had a total sense of calm this morning as I drove to class. So peacefull. Feal like I can leave now and know there WILL in fact be people who will miss me. That's an amazing feeling. I'm totally lacking fear. Now I feel calm and determined. I will wait for this thing, and give myself to it. Completely. I am ready to go his way.
CyberShrink
C, who would like it when you get to these intensely negative phases ? Fight the "thing" Do not go gently along with it --- it is not you, and it does not deserve to be followed, like a lab to the slaughter.
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