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Question
30 Jun 2005
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weird
i'm 26 my fiance 22. been with him since 18. age was neva a issue but of late for me at least its become one. well not so much the age but his more experienced that what i am- sex, relationship and other other stuff too. before i was pretty happy but now i'm rethinking my life and if i didnt sell myself short. also my goal i keep having in my head is to make him so happy then to dump him. that way i wont feel bad and he'll feel as hurt as i was when he was rude etc. other times i want to be with him forever. am i completely messed up and how do i get over it?
CyberShrink
Early-formed relationships can be satisfying, but they may also represent a sort of closure on other opportunities and acquaintances in a period of life when maybe exploring and getting to know a range of types of people could help one to discover the sort of person with whom one would be most compatible.
But the idea of trying to make him awfully happy before dumping him, is like giving the Christmas Turkey a really nice meal before terminating him and starting the roast --- is that really necessary ? You aren't showing, emotionally, the sort of maturity your years might lead you to expect of yourself, and you sound really ambivalent about this relationship. Maybe counselling would help you to sort out your feelings usefully.
But the idea of trying to make him awfully happy before dumping him, is like giving the Christmas Turkey a really nice meal before terminating him and starting the roast --- is that really necessary ? You aren't showing, emotionally, the sort of maturity your years might lead you to expect of yourself, and you sound really ambivalent about this relationship. Maybe counselling would help you to sort out your feelings usefully.
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