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09 Dec 2005

What is wrong with me
Good morning Poeple

First of all I have learned so much from this forum and it helped me a great deal. When I read some of these postings my problem seem to be so small. I have been here for a few weeks and I have never had the guts to talk about my problem. Well here I ago. My husband died 3 years ago of cancer. Since he was diagnosed he was very sick for 10 months. I was dealing with so much in my marraige....infertility...in laws out of hell...he's sosializing till the early mornings of the hours....that I think I lost myself in the prosess. I was the stable one the one that try to keep a balance. After he died I suffered from severe depression but I overcame it and work very hard to stay out of my hole..but there is always a but...Now I have become a insecure person with a lot of baggage and I don't know to deal with it because I was never like that. I met this wonderful person 8 months ago and we have really a great relationship. I am so jealous (sorry for spelling) and that is not me to be like that. He has never gave me reason to be jealous of him before. I mean I am even jealous if he speaks to his ex inlaws. I try to hide it but it is so hard for me. My whole life I was such a stable and secure person and now it feels like I have become so pathetic. He has got so much patience with me but for how long. I must pull myself together but my emotions is playing yo yo with me.....Thanks for listening
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Expert
CyberShrink
cybershrink

01 Jan 0001

Hello ZeeZee, It's good to hear more from you ( and your spelling is excellent ! )
Surely you richly deserve some counselling, to unpack and sort out this modest pile of emotional baggage you are now carrying round with you ? Sometimes, after a bad relationship, especially an abusive one, when you find yourself in a happy and good relationship, at some level you feel undeserving of such luck, and expect something to go wrong --- and that may spark off this inappropriate jealousy. If it's good, relax, you DO deserve it.
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