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27 Jan 2004

Where has the romance gone?
My boyfriend and I have been 2getha for almost 3 years and have been living 2getha for a year and a half. Lately we seem to have lost the plot as far as romance, affection and our sexual needs for each other. We have passed it off to stress through finances, work, etc but both are actually using this as an excuse. I know we both still love each other but it seems that the attitude from both of us is that if you aren't going to do anything, neither am I. Please help us by giving us both idea's on how to spark the romance and passion without it costing an arm and a leg. Hope you can help.
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Expert
CyberShrink
cybershrink

01 Jan 0001

Dear Trish,
Your query hints at what a large part of the problem might be --- the auditing, like an emotional accountant, of how much the other person puts into the relationship, as a measure of how large your own investment ought to be. Unless you can give to the other person without counting the small-change of what you receive in return, you don't really have a relationship yet. As the saying goes, you have to give, to get.
And if he's shy in talking about love-matters, concentrate on non-verbal communication ! From your last message, it sounds like things are beginning to proceed well in this direction !
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