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28 Jan 2004

Wot's wrong with me??????
Hi, I got into a very serious relationship wen I was very young, was in the relationship for 5 yrs...My ex was very posessive and jealous, I cudnt speak to other guys, cudnt go out with my friends, cudnt speak to his friends.Well basically my life had to revolve around him..and even tho I was miserable, I loved him with all my heart and I basically forced myself to get out as I knew it wasnt healthy being in that relationship.Well its now been 3 yrs since we split and still I cant seem to get into proper relationship..when I meet good guys I push them away and I normally tend to fall for all the wrong ones.For example, I'll fall for guys who are already in relationships.My friends say that's coz subconciously I'm not ready to be in a relationship coz I'm very scared of getting hurt. Or the guys I meet jus all seem to just lose interest. Initially they seem totally into me and then a few weeks later I just dont hear from them.I really feel that I want a b/friend now, coz I'm miserable - not having any1 special, that I can spend quality time with. But I jus cant seem to find sum1. I'm not a bad-looking girl, I've got quite alot goin for me, good career...I'm independant..but wot's wrong with me, My friend's are always sayin, he wasnt the rite one for you or its his loss but after it happening quite a few times I've got to ask wots wrong with me...and I'm now especially miserable coz every1 around me is getting engadged or married and here I cant even find a boyfriend...
Answer 374 views

01 Jan 0001

Dear miserable,
This is where personal counselling can be so very helpful. Sometimes after an unpleasant experience like your previous major relationship ( isn't it odd how we can love someone so utterly unloveably controlling and selfish ? ) we can draw unhelpful conclusions from the experience, which stunt our future ability to be freelly loving in relationships. But I am sure you can work it out, with the temporary help of a counsellor.
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