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05 Oct 2009

Me and my boyfriend of 7 years have separated.i have found out that he was cheating on me and now have splited since we were staying under the same roof.The problem is that for the past four months that we have split all i feel is pain.I cannot sleep at night because i keep asking myself why did he have to leave me.Our 2 year daughter keeps asking me about her daddy and i don' t know what to say to her.When he moved out on the falt that we were renting he told his family that i was taken money from him that is why he couldn' t help his parents or renovate their houses.he was staying with his friends now has moved to his own flat and refuses to come and take his things that he left at the flat.He has strings of girlfriends and party like no bodies business.I want to stop worrying about him and focus on taking care of my LG.Hope you give me advice as i cannot concentrate well at work.
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Divorce support expert
Divorce support expert

01 Jan 0001

Dear Tebogo,

a breakup can be as painful as loosing someone to death. You have to give yourself time to mourn your loss. Your daughter is also feeling it and you are also sharing her pain, however it is also important that you be honest with yourself and possibly recognise some signs that the relationship was in trouble. It sounds like the father of your daughter lacks maturity and I am guessing that if your daughter is asking after him it means that he is not keeping contact with her?
Allow yourself to explore the opportunities that are and will present themselves to you. It would be also a good thing to establish what role he is going to play in your daughter's life and possibly start exploring some co-parenting responsibilities.

Kind regards
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