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02 Dec 2005

Have not told you everything
Hi Expert and Forum. I just cannot got go and see a councellor my situation does not allow it, pls believe me. Until three yrs ago I was fine then this boy came into my life, I am a succesful businessman and am good lookin and am in a relatiosnhip of 10 years, but this young man has turned my life upside down, since I met him I have cried mot nights I have never felt this way over anyone, I go out and pay for sex to get over my heart ache, I am very anxious, I never was before, I started smoking, I was an honest partner, now I have sex encounters withs trangers in the street and then I cry, I am consumed by grief Mr Expert, I feel so empty and lonely I have no one to talk to, This boy is all that I live for, He is around me constantly its driving me crazy, why can I not love my a
partner like I love this boy, I run 10kms everymorning to deal with my grief, I just cannot see me reaching 40 yrs I cannot see it the pain in my heart is overwhelming I just dont have the strentgh, Pls try to understand that I have tried to manage this as best I can, so well that no one at work or my partner knows of my pain, I need todo something But I feel no confidence in myself, I just cannot see a life ahead, I am so scared that I will fall into this trap again, I am not a victim I am just in alot of emoyional pain and I cannot deal with it. I never had this pain until three yrs ago, I was happy then, this boy has destroyed my life, I have done everything for him, He is like an angel in my eyes, I love him very much....I am so tired of fighting. God i just dont know whattodo anymore.
Answer 386 views
Gay, lesbian and bisexual expert
Gay, lesbian and bisexual expert

01 Jan 0001

Hi again Madlyinlove.

Not acting on this has got significant implications for your mental health as well as your relationship. You may need to replace the word love with 'obsessed'.

I stand by my previous comments. This issue is bigger than you think and to date you've been unable to resolve it on your own - you need professional assistance so I urge you to find a way to get counselling. You can call the Gay & Lesbian Helpline on (021) 4 222 500 any day between 1 pm and 9 pm to discuss this with a counsellor.
The information provided does not constitute a diagnosis of your condition. You should consult a medical practitioner or other appropriate health care professional for a physical examination, diagnosis and formal advice. Health24 and the expert accept no responsibility or liability for any damage or personal harm you may suffer resulting from making use of this content.
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