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06 Apr 2006

Please explain
Very interesting response to post 329 from the forum Expert but I have a follow-up question which I hope you can answer - I notice that most people use the terms top/vers/btm (just look at gaydar for example), which is fine and does make sense (in most scenarios but not in others) but how does this relate to terms such as active as passive? Or am I just a bit behind the times?
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Gay, lesbian and bisexual expert
gay, lesbian and bisexual expert

01 Jan 0001

Hi Who's Asking and welcome to our forum.

Yes, the terms top/versatile/bottom have generally become internationally accepted. And it does make sense in all scenarios so if you're unsure of how to use these terms in any scenes or scenarios please post again. Not as a follow-up post or as a response to a previous post - a reminder that I only respond once to each fresh post.

You're not behind the times - the terms active/passive are still used but often as a secondary term to top/vers/btm, subject to the context. Primarily top/vers/btm refers to the preferred sexual role (usually but not always based on concepts of penetrative versus penetrated) and the terms active/passive refer to the manner in which these roles are expressed. Use your imagination here: A bottom would obviously be on the receiving end of things but a passive bottom may be merely taking it while a more active bottom may actually be contributing to the friction and determining that the right spots are being hit in the right way at the right pace.

You still working with me here Who's Asking? Concentrate and use your imagination and you'll snap this with ease.

A passive top may prefer the bottom to be astride him and in control of the pace of things.

Importantly, the top isn't always in control of the action. The terms active/passive often have to do with how power and control are managed - on many levels - in a particular sexual interaction.
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