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14 Jul 2006

RE: GAY SEX WITH FRIEND
Not to batter an old horse to death but this post brought about some interesting debate.

I just want to know if connecting gay with this is correct ??

SHouldnt it be seen as man to man sex rather then gay sex? I know this is trying to cut a fine line here but surely being gay is not only about sex as stereotype society wants to believe?

Shouldnt we have a stronger and more clearly defined stand on this or am I getting to technical about this?

ANy thoughts ???
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Gay, lesbian and bisexual expert
gay, lesbian and bisexual expert

01 Jan 0001

Hi again Niiki, as always thanks for contributing to the forum and please accept my apologies for a very late response to this post.

Grant, who’s post you referred to, didn't disclose his sexual orientation. In the light of the concept of MSM (Men who have Sex with Men, which we've discussed previously on the forum) not always identifying as gay (in fact many identify as straight), ALL sex that involves only men should by rights be referred to as "MSM sex". This would cater for married and straight-identifying men having sex with other men, opportunistic gay sex (as occurs in prisons, the military and boy's schools), and bisexual men. In terms of discussing sexual violence between men, I agree that this is not necessarily a "gay" issue and the term male-on-male sexual abuse or violence would be more appropriate.

I don't think you're being technical at all. Many men who engage sexually with other men do not identify as gay. Many do not even identify as bisexual. The reality is that many straight men interact sexually with other men.
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