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15 Aug 2007

Stubborne sister - confuss
Hi There
Ii's me . . full of probs again. Last night my mom gave me a call. My sis went to hopsital because of her kiddneys.They don't work proberply anymore. But thats fine (we've been through this before)
it's her attitute.

I phoned her last night to hear how she is feeling and just to talk and take her mind of things.

But she just yeld at me because "we don't care", "you're never there for me" , mind your own f*cking busness" ect. And it's not true , but anyway .I don't think she is honest with us. Her bf drinks way to much and I think it's affecting everythink more.

They broke up for the 1000000000000000's time and I think she is just pretending. Today my mom phoned her and she told my mom she's at work.

Now what now?? Do we mind our own f*cking busness , or believe her??? I don't know anymore . And for the record , we don't have a very close relationship.

I feels better just talking about it , Thanx !
Sue
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Gay, lesbian and bisexual expert
gay, lesbian and bisexual expert

01 Jan 0001

Hello again Sue and thanks for this post.

Good advice from TeenQueen. Your sister sounds very angry, possibly due to her current circumstances or her past. And for some reason she's acting this out against you, or what you represent to her, and possibly aimed at your family. See the bigger picture, see the world from her perspective. Allow her to be angry, without your becoming defensive, and try to find out where her anger stems from. You're not very close - why not? What is that about? What factors contributed to this? It may have absolutely nothing to do with you personally. Ideally she would be seeing a counsellor to work through these issues and you could be setting yourself up for failure by trying to take this on alone. If it becomes too tough for you back off IMMEDIATELY - it sounds as if your sister definitely needs professional help.

Ideally there'd be a few sessions of family therapy to work through this, which could be an option if your sister is on a medical aid that provides for counselling or one of you could afford to pay private rates. Discuss these options with your sister's doctor if necessary - he may be able to motivate counselling to the medical aid or activate a social worker (in a large state hospital).
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