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05 Apr 2006

TO ALISON - re : POST 20
Just for the sake of others I have started a new posting in reference to POST 20

Hi Alison

You have to keep in mind that your choice of almost androgynous (not male and not female) will cause huge stress on your wife and that this "presentation" extends and influences everyone else around you. Your choice is perhaps more complexed and more difficult that mine.

No, I have never felt "inbetween" and since the age of 5 KNEW I AM a girl. THe social influences FORCED me to make a choice and TRY to live as per my genitals. Hindsite is a wonderfull thing, isnt it, TODAY i KNOW i made the wrong choice and left nothing but pain and destruction in my wake.

You would need to have a serious "self-search" and determine wether what you want is not now a conflict of your inner self (female) against a sense of guilt. Feelings of guilt can play havoc and to a great extend force you to find a "comfort zone", thus making yourself happy to an extend as well as those around you. You need to work through this with the help of a skilled psychologist/psychiatrist else you may find yourself forever in agony and continue to pass that pain to everyone around you.

I know this is not easy, but it gets easier when you are first and foremost TRUE to yourself. I have not and will not abandon my family but I will not turn back either, I owe it to myself. Having achieved that sense of I am not guilty of ANYTHING, I can now deal with and HELP my family understand and accept.

I really think a lesson we as TG (whatever category) need to learn is to find that inner peace with ourselves and then once that is in place we can deal with and support the people in our lives in a positive manner.

Answer 366 views
Transgender advisor
Transgender expert

01 Jan 0001

Thanks for the writing!

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