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03 Feb 2013

Cold down there
Hi Guys and Doc

I am a 35yr old guy with two kids staying for six months with my 26yr old girlfriend who has two kids from two different relationships (both born on ceaser sec). I hope ladies will assist here. All my previous relationships were normal when it come to lovemaking. My current lover somehow feels a bit less warm down there. I noticed that from our first encounter (both HIV negative) and thought it was some kind of anxiety or so. She is very loving, beautiful body and very sexy, always plays her part in any lovemaking session we had and i give her full credit in that dept. We doing great emtionally and support each other in whatever way you can think of. Even when fingering, that warmth is not there or very low and it now becomes an effort for me to make love to her. I have lost erections a number of times especially when she is on top or on doggy style, even on missionary i have to get assistance from over the counter stuff to keep stiff which i dont like. I never had ED in the past and i am very athletic, look well after myself and take alcohol once in while, stopped smoking long time before we met. I have regular morning glory and do wank sometimes with no problem as most men do i believe. I really love her and we did discuss me paying lobola and get married. Now i am not sure whether is there anything to make things better. I never though of cheating in the past but i now really miss the warmth of a woman down there. I still have not discussed this with her and have blamed the loss of erections to work stress (which is absent) and she always understood, and i feel for her because she is very emotionally fragile and dont want to break her heart. I dont want to lose her but also feel that i still need to enjoy sex like i did before her. Has this happened to anyone of you guys ? Why is it happening ? Can it be solved ? Please Doc and the guys assist me, this is now killing me inside and dont want to blame myself for this.

Thanks, God Bless.
Answer 15,814 views

01 Jan 0001

Dear Khumbulani,

I am not sure if I understand what you mean by "warm down there". Do you mean she does not lubricate and she is dry? Do you mean that you feel her vagina is not tight enough around your penis? Do you literally mean the temperature of her vagina is cold versus having a warm body heat?
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