How to function with erectile dysfunction

One-eyed ranger, Rumpleforeskin, upright citizen and leader of the sack are just some of the affectionate names that guys have for their penises, and this is an indication of the close relationship we have with our family jewels.

So, when your penis suddenly struggles to salute the queen, stand at attention, or bat a home-run (well, you get the idea) – it is similar to losing your right hand when you are right-handed.

Jokes aside though, erectile dysfunction is no laughing matter for the scores of men who report erectile problems at clinics across South Africa. Global statistics show that 1 out of 10 men experience erection problems.

However, even if you are one of the millions of men suffering from weak erections, there is hope.

By speaking to your doctor, you will be made aware of the various medical interventions that can help put the air back in your rubber dinghy.

But if you are a little embarrassed to speak with a medical professional (as most guys tend to be), and you have the time, money and a sense of adventure, then we recommend the following Matildas range of sexual stimulants:

Constrict your boa with a Vibrating Penis Ring. It’s a “firm” favourite and will help give you harder, longer-lasting erections while the powerful vibrating ring gives her delicious sensations.
• Put air in your flat with a Penis Pump. It will increase length and girth, resulting in a fuller, thicker and longer penis. Use it before fitting on your penis ring.
Give yourself a hand with HOT XXL Crème. It increases girth, size and pleasure and is the perfect way to maximise your manhood, thanks to the natural libido-boosting ingredients of Jojoba oil and Ginkgo.

REMEMBER: These are merely alternatives for you to explore and maybe even bring some fire back to your love-making. Always keep in mind that erectile dysfunction may also be a result of a broader health concern and, if the problem persists, you should speak to a specialist

Read more about erectile dysfunction.
We live in a world where facts and fiction get blurred
In times of uncertainty you need journalism you can trust. For 14 free days, you can have access to a world of in-depth analyses, investigative journalism, top opinions and a range of features. Journalism strengthens democracy. Invest in the future today. Thereafter you will be billed R75 per month. You can cancel anytime and if you cancel within 14 days you won't be billed. 
Subscribe to News24
Voting Booth
The ANC's leadership race is heating up. Who do you think will be elected party president at Nasrec in December?
Please select an option Oops! Something went wrong, please try again later.
Nkosazana Dlamini-Zuma has got it in the bag
7% - 797 votes
I foresee a second term for Cyril Ramaphosa
83% - 9192 votes
Don’t discount a Zweli Mkhize win
10% - 1080 votes
Rand - Dollar
Rand - Pound
Rand - Euro
Rand - Aus dollar
Rand - Yen
Brent Crude
Top 40
All Share
Resource 10
Industrial 25
Financial 15
All JSE data delayed by at least 15 minutes Iress logo
Editorial feedback and complaints

Contact the public editor with feedback for our journalists, complaints, queries or suggestions about articles on News24.