- On Purpose podcast host Jay Shetty says watching TV together is the lowest form of intimacy.
- Instead of entertainment, he encourages couples to experiment with new things in their relationships.
- High levels of intimacy include learning together, like reading a book or going on a retreat.
Intimacy is all about connectedness, and cuddling on the couch in bed to watch TV is an ideal way to explore intimacy with a partner.
But former monk and On Purpose podcast host Jay Shetty, acclaimed for his wise advice on life, relationships and spirituality, says it is not it. Jay said, "Most of us only do one thing with our partners: watching TV. And that is the lowest form of intimacy that you could possibly ask for with any human being."
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He spoke about intimacy to Steven Bartlett on his Diary of A CEO podcast.
"If you and I watch TV together for 200 hours a year, we would potentially be no closer than we were before. I have this of intimacy, and entertainment is on the lowest rung of the ladder. But that is what the majority of couples are doing. So if we're only watching TV together, I promise you, that relationship is not growing. It is actually falling apart slowly, and you have no idea."
"I know it is a painful truth to accept."
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Instead of entertainment, Jay says people should be interested in experiences together. "Something new, something fresh and experiment together." He adds that other high levels of intimacy include learning together, like reading a book, going on a retreat etc. Or even doing separate things but reporting back to each other.
Some of his Instagram followers agreed while others disagreed with him.
One follower wrote, "Damn Jay. We are tiiired at the end of the night once the kids go down. TV is our time."Another one wrote, "Yes and no. If both people are only mindlessly watching TV together, then yes, this is true. But I think it also can be used as an inspiration or a stepping stone for them to find another common interest/passion to share together which would lead to more intimacy. Maybe they feel inspired to plan a trip together after watching a food/travel documentary series or recreating the cuisine at home in their own kitchen. Or a fantasy show gets them to create fan art together. So TV can be a starting point, but definitely not the only thing for couples to share together in order to build intimacy."
Another shared, "YES!!! This is all my husband ever wanted to do with our lives! I left the marriage and have done so much more since…"