FATHERS were encouraged to share their God-given love and bless those they were supposed to bless.
Useless fathering was condemned by Rev. Vuyelwa Sebolao of the Trinity Methodist Church in Bloemfontein during the Father’s Day service at the Centenary Methodist Church.
The fathers were all ears during her teaching, before being spoiled with a full Sunday meal and dessert prepared by the women.
Sebolao spoke strongly against “blessers” and “sugar daddies” and she encou-raged the men to build a real father-child relationship.
According to her, a father’s effort towards building a mutual relationship with his children will protect them against giving in to the demands of other men in exchange for material things that they want.
“Learn to hug your children, kiss them, express your love to them and teach them to do the same,” she emphasised.
Sebolao further highlighted how today’s children ended up in the “blesser” and “sugar daddy” situations due to being too materialistic and ended up being enticed by these “fathers” who promised them money and heavenly things.
The parents are also similarly to blame for not teaching their children the value of their bodies and by giving them what they want instead of what they need.
“What they really need, is their parents’ love. They tend to think: ‘What do I have to lose if I give that person what he wants and I get what I want?’ ”
Relying on society’s practice around ubuntu, Sebolao pointed out that there were still fathers who did not even care for their own children for their own selfish reasons, like fighting with the mother.
“And now the children are suffering.”
Sebolao continued to describe the world’s best father as a friend, an anchor, a teacher, a hero, a constant source of encouragement and a role model, all in one. The church is also not doing enough towards promoting fatherhood by separa-ting the families when they go to church, she said.
“A father nourishes, protects, provides, teaches, loves unconditionally, cares and protects,” she continued.
“You must be able to know at which time of the month your daughter’s menstrual cycles move, including their brand of sanitary pads,” she said to the now mumbling men.
On behalf of the men, Daniel Mabotsa, the circuit steward of the church, encou-raged his fellow men to go and practise what they had heard at home and highlighted how children especially tend to go wrong.
“I am going to forgive all my children when I leave here.
“I felt like calling them all and tell them that I forgive them, but I did not want to show off,” he joked.
A poem was recited by Matshego Sebeela entitled Be a father, not a boss. Lerato Mogoregi recited My Hero and Tsholo Sebolao recited It takes more than blood to the pleased fathers.