'My rude awakening to the modern dating scene': A divorcee's advice

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The flings and fun only helped temporarily, but actually left me feeling mentally worse off.
The flings and fun only helped temporarily, but actually left me feeling mentally worse off.

Writing in response to the previously published Dating after a divorce - Do's and Don'ts, one divorcee has written into Parent24 to share what he's learned since getting back on the horse after 34 years of marriage. 

His letter follows: 

"After being married for 34 years, letting go of my wife two months ago was the hardest decision of my life. 

We had drifted apart over the past 3 to 4 years, and she wanted out as the relationship had become toxic.

In part, to fill the void and to reduce the anguish and pain, I realized I needed someone in my life. I needed a loving wife or partner. The flings and fun only helped temporarily, but actually left me feeling mentally worse off.

This was the start of my rude awakening to the modern dating scene.

I quickly discovered that for the majority of women in their 40's and 50's, if they have never been married - they are not looking for a long term relationship as they don't want to alter their lifestyle or independence.

This also applies to a lesser degree to women who have been divorced for the past 10 years plus.

The only category in this age group actively looking for a serious relationship or commitment were those that were recently divorced or widowed.

On the plus side, I have grown as a person by stepping out of my comfort zones, started exercising again and re-evaluated my priorities in life, as well as my treatment and how I interact with women."

- Anonymous  

Also see: Parent24's #dignifieddivorceseries is here to help parents navigate the legal and emotional implications of a divorce.

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