How much say do relatives have in your baby name choices?
And what happens when they want to play your role and select your child's name, when you've clearly stated that goes against your wishes?
Not for this interfering mother-in-law.
At a time that was supposed to be joyful for the whole family, a mom who calls herself Mama Bear, woke up from a C-section induced coma to find that her husband had filled in their new baby's birth certificate without her.
This wouldn't have been so bad, had he not been persuaded by his mother to change the spelling of the child's second name - directly against the mother's express wishes.
Mama Bear explained all in a letter to Slate.com, revealing in their Care and Feeding advice column how unhappy she was about what happened to her.
"Dear Care and Feeding, my son is two months old, and I just discovered my husband spelt our son's middle name as 'Finlay' instead of 'Finley' on all his legal documentation. I, of course, am furious because I told him I was fine with the middle name, but it had to be spelled Finley - and he agreed before our son was ever born."
Mama Bear believes that when she was unconscious, her mother-in-law convinced her husband to change the way their baby's child is spelt on the child's birth certificate. The selected second name was Finley, and Mama Bear insisted that it be written with an 'e' instead of an 'a'.
"She tried to convince him to give our son a first name that I very much hated, saying that I would get mad, but get over it. My husband thought changing his first name was too much, but gave in to spelling his middle name the way his mum wanted. She thinks that 'Finlay' is more masculine than 'Finley'."
Nevertheless, two months after her birth, Mama Bear was shocked to find out that her husband had gone back on their agreement and changed the spelling on the birth certificate, while she was unconscious after the caesarean section.
She thinks her mother-in-law influenced her husband to do this by guilt-tripping him, as she describes her mother-in-law as manipulative.
Mama Bear says she got suspicious when her mother-in-law sent a Christmas card with the child's name incorrectly spelt.
She did not act on her suspicion at the time, but while she was filling in her son's documents for safe-keeping, she discovered that the name is spelt wrong.
The outraged mom is furious that her husband misled her, letting her believe that the name was spelt Finley when legally it is not.
Even though her husband said that he regretted this act as soon as the card came, he admitted that he was afraid to tell his wife what happened.
Share your stories and questions with us via email at firstname.lastname@example.org. Anonymous contributions are welcome.
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