Desperate dads, angry moms

Once upon a time these people liked each other enough to take off their clothes and make a baby. Most of them even loved each other enough to get married.

But now, after a break up, there is a cold war (or a hot one) of mud-slinging and blame. Whether the issue is maintenance or who sees a child when, it seems difficult for exs to find a safe middle ground.

Here are some quotes from users in the thick of the battle. Click on the links to read more.

The dads say...

‘My ex has asked me to pay the R10 000 outstanding school fees (which I have already paid over to her in the form of maintenance) otherwise she can’t get her into the school we are planning to send her to. Problem is, I do not have it.’ - Incorrect spending of child maintenance

‘I found out that she lied about me being the father of the second child but I'm also have doubts that the first one is mine.’ - Formal agreement regarding maintenance

‘What is the percentage of a man's salary that must go for maintenance, and is it possible that a child in grade one cost over R4000 a month?’ - Maintenance

‘I have been having trouble like this with her for 5 yrs, and have spent thousands, no luck.’ - Ex wife frustrating access

‘How do I bring about peace between us? I have tried for 3 years but to no avail. I hate her with a passion.’ - Why is my ex so evil?

The moms say...

‘If I cancel one of his visits I have to give a valid reason’s only fair BUT if he cancels a visit he doesn't give me any reason.’ - Fathers cancels his visits

‘He has unlimited visitation rights, as and when he pleases, as he refuses to make arrangements with me.’ - What is fair

Even the new wives and the aunts have their say...

‘How is it that some moms have to beg for financial support from their baby-daddies and get a pathetic R750 a month, while other moms use their kids to supplement their personal income?’- Dad paying too much

‘If you take that tone with me again you will NOT visit Daddy this weekend...’ - Single parent syndrome

‘Is there any legal right at all for a man who is wanting to be a DAD and meet his financial obligations? It doesn’t seem so.’ - Another access question

‘Things are getting nasty and she WANTS as if they were married.’ - Maintenance what’s wrong and right

‘My husband has got no say in his child’s life, she doesn’t let him know about anything regarding his child.’ - Need some advice please

One enterprising user even started his or her own maintenance survey to find out who pays what.

Have your say

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