The first kiss

I’ve recently had three very good, if not a little scary, experiences on Facebook, which made me look at my kids in a different light. I was reunited with the first girl I kissed (at age 6), the first girl I had a crush on (at age 8) and the first girl I fell in love with (at age 13).

I’ve always had a very vivid memory and being reunited with these girls (women now) was a lovely, scary trip down memory lane. I had not heard or seen any of them for more than 30 years.

My first kiss was all innocence as we used to play mommy and daddy, and I’d come home from ‘work’ and kiss her hello. My first crush was with a classmate during the class end of year party in Std 1 (grade 3 now, I think). We danced together to ‘Kung Fu Fighting’ and that was it, I was hooked.

And my first love was the stuff of classic novels. I never kissed her, or held her hand, we worked together as students at a supermarket on the weekend and we wrote letters to each other, but never actually saw each other out of the work environment. The memories it brought back were wonderful and tinged with that sweet veil of innocence. The woman in question even admitted that she still has one of my letters.

The scary thing about it was that I suddenly realised that if I was capable of this at these ages, surely Hannah, Maddi and Sofia are bound to experience something similar down the line. The other day Hannah was telling me how one of her classmates had kissed her ‘boyfriend’ on the lips. These are 9-year-olds!

Maddi’s still too young to comprehend the reality of having a boyfriend, but has already had 2. Dawie was cute with his huge head and piercing blue eyes and enormous bulk, I had no doubt that he was going to be the next super prop for the Springboks. Now it’s Steven, who has the look of a banker or financier… We’ll see.

Sofia is in the Barbie stage, so no worries there yet. But I am a little disturbed that I had these intense feelings so young, and my kids might too. I remember my little heart not feeling very well when my first experience petered out.

Admittedly my naïveté of youth meant I moved on pretty quickly, but it has been hidden in my psyche all this time, only now to be reawakened by Facebook. And how am I to react when Maddison comes home one day (and I have no doubt that this is in the pipeline in the next few years) and says ‘Dad, so and so, kissed me on the lips’.

Or what if Hannah says, with real emotion (she’s such a sensitive, in-tune girl) ‘Dad, I think I love so and so,’ at age 9? It was real for me when I was that age, surely it can be real for them.

I would have to take a large dose of chill pills and actually react to it in an emotionally supportive way. Somehow it doesn’t seem that much has changed, except for technology making it faster and easier to do the things we did back when the dinosaurs walked the land?

Can you remember your first kiss?

Read more by Marlon Abrahams
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