Not too long ago I wrote a column about why I don't want to have children. Ever. But more recently I've been pondering the idea. Especially when looking at older people who don't have children. Suddenly being without any children and grandchildren one day is just not appealing.
So I got to thinking about falling pregnant. If I could avoid it, I would. Having watched people be pregnant and give birth there are just so many things that scare me.
1. Being sick
Some women seem so lucky. They fall pregnant, they glow, they give birth and they're wonderful mothers. Other women have 9 months of pure hell. The morning sickness never stops and they sweat more than they glow. I'm really afraid of being one of those women!
2. What if I don't enjoy pregnancy?
There are women, like my sister, who loved being pregnant. She is one of the previously mentioned women who glowed while pregnant and looked great. What if I, however, just hate being pregnant? What if I can't wait to get it over and done with? Nine months is a REALLY long time!
3. The pain
I am a complete and utter wimp when it comes to pain. I don't like pain and I never will. I think watching movies and hearing some women’s horror stories, has put a sort of giant red mark across the thought of childbirth in my head. And yet there are those who describe giving birth as beautiful...
4. The body you're left with afterwards
This coupled with sleepless nights and a crying baby surely must put some kind of strain on a relationship? I don't enjoy confrontation but do get aggro fairly quickly. I just know that if I feel awful about how I look and I'm really tired, there are bound to be fights. But that's normal right?
I think my greatest fear about being pregnant and inevitably, a mother is the unknown. Stepping blindly into the new realm that is motherhood will be scary. That much I'm sure of. I guess all that can be done is to hold on tight and jump. One day.
Share your experiences of pregnancy and motherhood with me in the comment box below or mail your story to chatback@ parent24.com.
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