Chrissy Teigen's heartbreaking post reminds us why it's important to open up about miscarriage

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"We are shocked and in the kind of deep pain you only hear about". (Instagram/chrissyteigen)
"We are shocked and in the kind of deep pain you only hear about". (Instagram/chrissyteigen)

Ever since sharing the news of her "quarantine surprise" pregnancy, Chrissy Teigen had been keeping her followers posted about her condition in her usual humorous manner, making her recent update even more heartbreaking. 

Posting a series of black and white images showing herself teary-eyed as she prepares for surgery and another of her and John holding their son, Chrissy shared that the family was "shocked and in the kind of deep pain you only hear about". 

"On this darkest of days, we will grieve, we will cry our eyes out. But we will hug and love each other harder and get through it," she wrote in the post announcing the miscarriage of their third child, a son they named, Jack. 

This past Sunday, despite being on strict bedrest Tiegen posted that the bleeding she had been experiencing for nearly a month had worsened and she was being admitted to hospital. 

Despite further treatment, including blood transfusions, Chrissy miscarried. 

ALSO SEE | 'There was nothing I did or could have done to prevent it': A reader shares her heartfelt experience of miscarriage

'You just made so many women feel seen'

"To our Jack - I’m so sorry that the first few moments of your life were met with so many complications, that we couldn’t give you the home you needed to survive. We will always love you". 

Since sharing, Chrissy has received an outpouring of support, with many commending her bravery and sharing their stories of loss. 

"I am so astonished and in complete awe of your bravery. You just made so many women feel seen by sharing this intimate grief," actress Melissa Fumero told Chrissy in response to her emotional announcement. 

'Women don't share their losses'

In recent years, Parent24 has received letters from moms who also experienced the tragic loss of miscarriage. 

One reader shared that it's so important that miscarriage is spoken about because it's something many women experience. 

It's true - women don't share their losses. Instead, they suffer in silence. Nobody knows what to say to you when you've experienced a miscarriage. Regardless of what anyone tells you - a miscarriage is a loss! Whether it be in your early stages or even later, the life you created was inside of you, and you carried that life for that duration. 
There is no timeframe in which to get over it, we all process things differently.
It's okay to have bad days. If you can't be vulnerable with yourself, then who?  I hope this story, just like the one I read, speaks to others who have endured loss through miscarriage". — Kelly

Read her letter here: 'Nobody knows what to say to you when you've had a miscarriage' - A reader shares her moving story

'I hate all of these responses'

Also sharing her experience, an anonymous reader says there are certain things not to say to someone after suffering a miscarriage. 

Some days are easier than others. Seeing pregnant women and babies is still something I find difficult. People have told me things like 'at least it happened early', 'it wasn't really a baby yet', 'you can try again', 'at least you know you can get pregnant', 'it just wasn't meant to be'. I hate all of these responses.
Just because it happened early does not take away from our loss. Just because we can have another baby, does not make us feel less sad. To every woman who has gone through this experience, you are not alone. You are allowed to grieve. You lost your baby regardless of what anyone says. Take your time to come to terms with what happened, however long that might take." — Anonymous 

Read more here: 'To every woman who has gone through this, you are not alone' - A reader's touching story of miscarriage

What comforted you most when you miscarried? 

Chatback:

Share your stories and questions with us via email at chatback@parent24.com. Anonymous contributions are welcome.

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