You have no idea what’s really going to happen. Or what to expect. Or who to ask. No-one can give you the idiot’s guide to raising children in general and multiples in particular, but there are ways to make it easier.
Here are some of the things that got us through the first months:
Join a support group. When I was pregnant with our girls we joined TATS (The Twins and Triplets Society), and we spoke to many families. They would all say how special their multiples are. And how blessed and honoured they were to be parents of multiples. To me they sounded as nuts. But alas, we too have gone over to the dark side. Our twins are incredibly special and we would not change them for the world. Maybe just a teeny weensy bit some days at suicide hour, but hey.
Get help. Have lots and lots of help. Take the opportunity to hand over a child to whoever comes to visit. Most people love babies and babies love to be held.
Let people cook you food and make you tea. Be shameless, you’ll get away with it!
Have a sense of humour. Whatever you do, never forget to laugh. You’ll laugh about it eventually anyway, so you might as well start now. It will make you feel a lot better, I promise!
If you need to take a moment, take a moment. In fact, take two. But then move on. And if you can’t move on, seek help. There’s absolutely no shame in that.
Ignore the breastfeeding police. But if you have the tools, at least give it a bash, you might surprise yourself. We already had a singleton so I understood breastfeeding and enjoyed it. BUT you should never ever feel like a bad mom if it just doesn’t work for you. Take two of those abovementioned moments and move on.
Make sure that you and your partner resolve any communication issues beforehand. Little niggling ‘things’ in a relationship can very quickly become mountains of resentment when you are tired and crabby.
Buy many, many nappies and wipes. Trust me.
If there already is an older child, spend extra time with them beforehand. We also kept ‘special’ things in the baby room for our boy to play with and he loved it. He felt a lot more included.
Last, but not least - enjoy them. You are blessed. I promise!
How did you handle having twins? Or are your pregnant with twins now? Share with us below.