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'I felt like I wasn't designed to have babies or be a mother': Trans dad shares his story

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Noah lives in Johannesburg with his partner, Gabriel
Noah lives in Johannesburg with his partner, Gabriel

Dysphoria. Noun. A state of generalised unease, unhappiness, restlessness, dissatisfaction, or frustration. The opposite of euphoria.

Because we fit the mould, it's difficult for most cisgender women (like me) to understand what it means to be transgender. We conform – or have learnt to conform – to the world's idea of what it is to be a woman. And it's easy for us. Cis women have a song sheet on how to be a woman and, not to brag, but I can sing the bejesus out of it.

However, in writing this series of articles, and contemplating what it means to parent someone who might not fit the mould, I found myself desperate to relate to the trans experience. To find a parallel – or even an intersectionality – between trans people's lived experiences and my own, because the gap between trans and cisgender people is just too wide.

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