Decipher your sexual fantasies

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For a long time popular beliefs was that men are the only gender that indulges in sexual fantasies. But, as you may already know, women also do enjoy a little bit of naughty day dreaming. Research shows that the content of our sexual fantasies does not actually differ that much, but it is different for men. Here are the most common fantasies, and their meaning. Shhhh… don’t tell anyone. Domination There’s a saying that ‘shy girls are the wildest in bed.’ Whether true or not, research shows that fantasing about being dominant is all about power, where you’d like to take control and be the one calling the shots. Studies show that women who fantasise about domination are those who live a timid life. Being assertive allows you to show and experience a bit of power over your partner, though he may be in a position of power in real life. You are the decision-maker when it comes to your body, so why not be dominant. Submission Fantasising about your man taking control over you is common with type A personalites. These ladies run the world in real life. And letting go of the reigns would be a perfect scenario in the bedroom. These fantasies can range from submission, sex slavery, and even sexual violence. Why oh why would any woman even daydream about this after we’ve fought so hard for our rights and equality? Well, experts cite that it’s not really about the outrageously absurd contents of your fantasies, but it’s more about experiencing your wild side, and doing things you will be ostracised to do in real life. It doesn’t mean that women want to be raped, beaten or forced to submit to a man. Those who practice real life submission are more about role playing than actually hurting anyone. A 1984 study by psychology researchers Dr. Schwartz and Dr. Masters, showed that people who fantasize about sexual violence, were appalled and not aroused when showed videos with such violence. Which proves that it really isn’t about wanting this in real life. Being watched Do your fantasies circle around recording a porno movie for the world to see, or doing it on the balcony in full view of the neighbours? It may be at a club, where everyone can watch and be watched. Watching and being watched during sex, otherwise called voyeurism is a fantasy about ego. A porno, or sex on display may get the people who are watching in the mood and aroused; and knowing that you are responsible and are in control can be very appealing for some women. Sex with an ex or a stranger This is all about spontaneity. While society throws rules at you about what is morally right or wrong, you can't help but wish to do something impulsive. In real life, you would never sleep with a stranger or an ex, but in your fantasies you can. Your ex may have been great in bed, because he knew exactly where to touch you, and stranger is a sort of no strings attached sexual release and impulsiveness. An orgy Okay, this may be so dirty that you feel shy even thinking about it. But, apparently fantasizing about group sex is all about the pleasure you feel you can get by being with many people – many ways of being stimulated at the same time. Experts say fantasies are normal and harmless, but people should be careful that they doesn’t upset your real-life expectations when it comes to sex, like your partner is not your ex, so you shouldn’t expect him to do the same things in bed. Don’t walk into rooms that look like Christian Grey’s sex room, unless that is what you are into in real life. And remember sex should physically harm or hurt you.

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