Early signs that he’s abusive

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Women don’t plan to enter into abusive relationships, and it’s often difficult to leave. As a way of protecting yourself, detect these signs as early as you can.

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He’s controlling

He insists that you ask permission from him to go anywhere. He goes through your phone to check who you’ve been talking to and frequently asks your whereabouts.

He blames others for his actions

He does want to be seen as the wrong person. He may apologise for yelling, putting you down, or hurting you, but will always find a way to make it your fault. Eventually, he will blame you for making him hit you.

He uses playful force during sex

He enjoys throwing you down or holding you down against your will; he finds the idea of rape exciting. He intimidates, manipulates or forces you to engage in unwanted sex acts.

He calls you names

He constantly criticises you or says cruel things. He degrades, swears and calls you ugly names. He will use vulnerable points about your past or current life against you.

He is very romantic and caring at first

Attorney Pamela Jacobs says abusers are often charming, attentive, and sweet in the beginning of a relationship. An abuser will work to make you feel so appreciated and loved, you won’t even notice he is controlling you sometimes, until it’s too late.

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