Loving and fulfilling relationships do exist


Being part of a rewarding relationship is actually not as far-fetched as we are led to believe says author and TV producer Msizi E Nkosi.

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It’s been another difficult week for South African women. We’ve learnt that some taxi drivers are not just verbally abusing women in ‘skimpy’ clothes, but they’re raping them too. And you don’t even have to wear something revealing to be a victim. We’ve heard women dissing others for wearing weaves at the Miss SA 2017 pageant.

I’ve never understood that anti-weave argument championed by the legendary Hugh Masekela. Just let women be, I feel. So much negativity isn’t good for our collective consciousness as a country.

I’ve noted that we’re forever going on and on about toxic relationships, that at times I wonder if we know what a great relationship is, and I wonder why we talk less about fulfilling ones.

Men Who Cheat, Women Who Cheat, Paternity Fraud, Abusive Lovers, Toxic Relationships…you’d swear the entire current generation is getting this relationship thing wrong.

I want her to tell me how to love her; I want her to tell me what turns her pages.

Is she the kind of a woman who loves and appreciates flowers, or she appreciates airtime and data more?

“Do you have a car?” is now too common a question many ladies ask potential guys. It’s most likely followed by, “What car is it?” In the minds of many, the car you drive signifies how deep are your pockets. Depressing. Have you never heard of guys driving latest BMWs but broke two days after pay day?

I want her to ask me what are my dreams; I want her to ask me where do I see myself in five years from now. I want her to have that goofy smile on her face when she talks about me because I make her happy. I want her to be loyal. I want her to love me. I want her to respect me. I want her to have a beautiful heart and mind. I want her to be my best friend.

And the beautiful part about this is that such relationships exist, such lovers exist. What a pity we tend to find them borrowing and choose wild cards who are sure to break our hearts.

I want her to be my stylist, I want her to respect and accept my family, I want her to accept I have a past and some of it is not pretty. I want a relationship where it’s both our priorities to make each other happy. I want us to constantly forgive each other. I want us to be free to say ‘No’ to each other times without inviting tension to our relationship.

I just want love to prosper.

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