Relationship Tips

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By Ziphezinhle Msimango

Whether you are the type who likes to have a shouting match until a matter is resolved or you prefer the indefinite silent treatment, the way a couple resolves their fights is a great determinant of the survival of their relationship.

Below are five tips to effective conflict resolution in romantic relationships:

Think before you speak

In the moment of anger when emotions are running high all you want to do is express your anger, get you point across and unload. But it's actually better and more effective to calm down, examine your feelings, then express yourself in a calm manner. This lessens the chance of impulsively saying things you may later regret

Get to the heart of the issue

Articulate your problem and then listen to understand his. That way you both know exactly what you are unhappy about and you can both work towards resolution.

Be willing to accept your part

It's not the case with all situations, but in some instances both parties have a part to play in creating  the conflict. In those cases each person must be willing to apologise to find a solution.

Remember that the aim is to preserve the relationship

Many people in their rage will only focusing on the anger inside them. But by reminding yourself that you value the relationship you're halfway there to finding  resolution.

 Find a mediator

If you have tried all sorts of ways to resolve the conflict with no success, it may be time to call in a mediator.  This person needs to be neutral and hear both sides fairly.

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