If you’ve been struggling to land a date, let alone a relationship, you can stop trying to figure out what you’re doing wrong. It’s not you. It’s the maths that’s flawed. According to the 2016 national census, South Africa has a population that’s 51% female, meaning there are more women than men in the country. Many reasons have influenced this imbalance, but whether the reasons are more men dying or emigrating for better work opportunities, the outcome is the same. There are just not enough men for the number of women we have in Mzansi. But, there are other factors that make it hard for modern women to find love.
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STATE OF THE NATION’S HEARTS?
Just as career opportunities have opened up, so too have definitions, expectations and hopes around relationships. “I think our understandings of love are as diverse as we are,” explains Mothepa Ndumo, CEO of Higher Self Career and Executive Coaching.
Take Nothemba, 42, who has never been married and is currently single. She wants to be in a relationship but finds it challenging because she’s a committed road runner. “I picked up running about 10 years ago and my life is built around it. I’m usually either training for or recovering from a marathon. I run at least four times a week so I have a set routine. This makes it difficult to go on dates in the evening and means that even on weekends, I can only meet up after I’ve trained or competed.” Finding time requires a bit of juggling, and this is where Nothemba finds most men lose patience.