Why I prefer second dates to be with family or close friends

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Illustration by Getty Images
  • Lizo* 25 shares a dating experience that led her to introduce potential suitors to her family or close friends.
  • She says, "when you're exposed to a big family and a community of friends, their opinion and input regarding almost every aspect of your life is important."
  • "Will I continue with this? People always ask. Definitely! It’s worked for me thus far, and I hope someone out there will consider this route."

Dating in your mid-20s will always be an interesting ride. It's a rollercoaster, coupled with meeting exciting characters, awkward encounters and actually figuring out what you want. For 25-year-old Lizo*, experiences have led her to introduce potential suitors to her family or close friends sooner rather than later. This is her story: 

"Growing up, I've always been surrounded by family. I come from a big family - eight siblings and four step-siblings. I'm a very family-oriented person and find community in them and my friends. I have quite a few friends from all walks of life and treasure them dearly. 

READ MORE | Dating coach on an alternative to 'shooting your shot' - 'Allow the man to make the actual approach'

When you're exposed to a big family and a community of friends, their opinion and input regarding almost every aspect of your life is important. I always seek advice from them, and I know they'll never lead me astray. 

So, when I entered the very complicated dating scene, I involved them. This sometimes resulted in past lovers feeling uncomfortable.

Would you introduce a potential suitor to your family and friends on the second date? Tell us about it here.

But I have learnt that the people close to me have my best interest at heart and are usually good judges of characters. This is why I decided to introduce potential suitors to them on a second date. It sounds crazy, but it actually works… well, for me. 

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So usually, I meet someone for the first time, and when they ask me out for a second date, I usually propose a date with 1 or 2 friends or family members of mine. Most of the time, they're game. Doing this has helped me a lot. How?

  • My family members or friends are always able to provide a second opinion
  • I'm able to assess if he'd fit in with the people in my life
  • It's also an opportunity for him to see me in the company of them and make an informed decision

Will I continue with this? People always ask. Definitely! It's worked for me thus far, and I hope someone out there will consider this route.

Not her real name*

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