'I begged my mom's fiancé not to tell her we dated and were intimate before they got together'

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An illustration. Photo by Getty Images
An illustration. Photo by Getty Images

  • Hayley* fell in love with an older colleague, Grant*, but their short relationship ended amicably when they both realised they had no chemistry.
  • Shortly after that, Grant started dating Hayley's mom, who didn't know about his relationship with Hayley, and they got engaged a year later.
  • Grant later suggested to Hayley they tell his fiancé about their dating stint, but Hayley swore him to secrecy.
  • Here is their story as told to Candice Habershon.

I bit my lip and took a deep breath. "I'm sorry, but I think we should just be friends," I said.

I looked up to see if Grant appeared wounded, but he wasn't. Instead, he grinned at me.

"No worries, Hayley, I was thinking the same thing, to be honest," he said. I was so relieved.

We finished our drink, and he kissed me on the cheek. "No hard feelings," he said. 

READ MORE | 'I just had to teach my partying husband a lesson for always leaving me alone at home'

We'd met through work - he was a lot older than me but didn't look it. We'd flirted for a while and then went on a few dates.

I'd slept with him a couple of times, and he was a great lover, but in the end, the age difference became a problem.

I was 27 and liked partying with my friends, whereas Grant was 42 and preferred nights in and playing golf.

A few days later, my mom came into the office to drop something off. She turned a few heads as she's always been quite glam. She loved it when men asked if we were sisters!

I introduced them. "She's a bit of a babe, isn't she?" he winked after she'd left. "Your lucky dad."

READ MORE | Woman finds out about ex-husband's infidelity in the newspaper's wedding announcement section

It was such a loaded comment, and I rolled my eyes. "My mom and dad divorced when I was tiny," I said. "She's single."

"Interesting," he said, walking off.

That night, mom rang and couldn't resist mentioning Grant.

"He seems very... nice," she said. I laughed. If only she knew! But over the next few weeks, - mom popped in a few more times and always ended upchatting to Grant.

Inevitably they started seeing each other.

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I didn't feel awkward about it - Grant was a genuinely great guy, just not right for me. But he was perfect for mom.

She'd had a string of failed relationships, so it was wonderful seeing her happy.

A year passed, and I met a guy I liked, Steve*. One night, mom invited Steve and me for dinner with her and Grant.

"We have some news," she said. "We're getting married."

I hugged them both excitedly.

READ MORE | Couple married for 10 years adds a woman they met on Facebook to their marriage

But later, when mom was in the bathroom, Grant pulled me aside. "We should tell her about us," he said.

I was shocked. The thought had never entered my mind.

"I don't feel comfortable getting married with it hanging over my head," he said. "She won't be upset."

I disagreed. Mom would be horrified! Steve wouldn't like it either. "You can never ever tell her," I said firmly and made him swear to secrecy.

It's their wedding in a couple of months, and recently Steve and I got engaged too.

I know lying is not good, but I don't think mom needs to know I slept with her husband!

What is your love story? Tell us about it here.

* Names changed to protect identities

Credit: aremedia.com.au/ magazinefeatures.co.za

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