Lift my heavy heart - and heavy boobs!

Why is it that men can go bald, age and get big bellies, yet still think they are God’s gift to women? While women who do not age very gracefully (and who gravity has taken a toll on) end up feeling afraid of losing their pot bellied men to slim, six packed, perky titted young tarts?

Today I sit with a heavy and saddened heart. Disillusioned by the man that I love dearly and who I would give my life for. I love him more each day, despite his age, paunch, baldness and ugly scars from an operation he had which saved his life - in conjunction with chemo.

I understand that this has had an impact on his virility, but I don’t need constant sex to feel like a beautiful, desirable woman! I just need some TLC and tenderness.

We have been together for six years - which is nothing compared to the 30 he spent with his late wife or the 25 I shared with my ex husband.

He had the most magnificent body when we met. I, alas, was already on the downhill path. Lazy titties, stretch marks from babies, scars from two major tummy ops (wish they were tummy tucks!) and piles, one of my biggest embarrassments, which most women end up with from pregnancies.

Back then, he made me feel like the most beautiful woman in the universe. He taught me things about my body that I never knew and had never experienced. There were so many firsts!

 I lost all inhibitions and embarrassment. I felt beautiful, like a goddess.  But then last night I asked the love of my life if I was still sexy. He did not say no, but he also did not say yes. His reply was that I needed some work, and I am “mooi”. I will never let him see me naked again…ever!

I feel so sad and unhappy about myself and this body I have been cursed with. I felt like packing my bags and leaving him so he can find his perky titted young tart and becoming a hermit. I am hiding from the world to protect them from the sight of me, which might just blind them.

I did not even dress up, do my hair or make up. What the hell for? Who am I kidding? Mutton dressed up as lamb no doubt. From now on I will only wear trousers and oversized shirts.

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