Is Meghan Markle’s stepbrother just being bitter? How to deal with inviting difficult people to your wedding

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Prince Harry pictured with Meghan Markle.
Prince Harry pictured with Meghan Markle.

The up and coming royal wedding is all almost everyone is talking about. From what Meghan will be wearing, to who will be part of her bridal party, Prince Harry and Meghan’s moves are being scrutinised very closely.

The latest drama surrounding Meghan? Is whether or not her dad will be at the wedding.

According to reports on Channel24, there were multiple claims from Meghan’s stepsiblings that Thomas Markle, Meghan’s dad, has been shunned and won’t be attending her wedding. It seems he might be going after all.

An absolute case of sour grapes, in one instance, her half-sister accused Meghan of not doing enough to help their father with his money troubles.

In another instance, which sparked the rumours that Thomas wouldn’t be at the wedding, Meghan’s half-brother Thomas Jr wrote a scathing letter – published on Intouchweekly.com - addressed to Prince Harry, in which he claims that Meghan is not the right woman for him and that she’s a conceited and shallow woman who will ruin Prince Harry’s family.

In the letter he also further goes on to state that Thomas Sr didn’t get an invite to the wedding.

People.com has since confirmed that Thomas will be attending the wedding and that while he hasn’t met Prince Harry formally yet, they’ve communicated numerous times over the phone.

The letter from her stepbrother, for me, speaks of someone who begrudges his sister's happiness. To spitefully send a letter filled with details that he knew would cause a stir, is someone I hope doesn’t score an invitation to her wedding.

But what Meghan's situation brings to light is that, even if you’re about to marry into royalty, Prince Harry and her are not exempt from being forced to deal with difficult family members and wedding guest drama.

READ MORE: Should fathers still be walking brides down the aisle?

Ask any couple what the most stressful part of wedding planning is, and chances are the answer to that question would be sorting out the guest list.

Who do you invite? Who should you leave off the list? Who can you get away with not inviting and who will condemn you to the darkest parts of Siberia if you don’t put them on your list?

Many will tell you that yes, it is your wedding and that you should be able to invite whoever you want to, and of course, there is a certain amount of truth to that.
But a wedding is only for a day and your relatives are with you for a lifetime, so navigating this minefield is one that should be approached with caution.

Stuck in any of the scenarios below? Here’s how to deal with it.

1. Your homophobic uncle or aunt insists on attending your wedding

If you're getting married to someone of the same sex, then dealing with homophobic family members is definitely a challenge. On the one hand, you just know that this person is bound to cause trouble if they do attend, yet not attending will result in the kind of family feud that will make the Game of Thrones Red Wedding look tame in comparison.

If you’re not concerned with any fallout whatsoever and if this person lives far enough that you don’t have to see them on a regular basis, then feel free to not invite them at all. It's not your fault that they're bigoted.

However, if the opposite is true, what you could do in this case, is to invite them to the reception instead of the ceremony – that way, they’d have no opportunity to object to your wedding. Also, remember, it is your wedding, so if you’re feeling obliged to invite them, at least lay down the rules.

Be clear that if they’re there to cause any trouble, they’ll be removed from the celebrations entirely.

2. You’re marrying a partner from another faith and the people who want to attend most are not very tolerant of other religions

Oh boy. Nothing causes more of an uproar than when your relatives find out you’re marrying someone from a different religious background.  On the one hand, you can opt to not invite them to the wedding and have a small and informal celebratory dinner afterwards.

However, if that’s not an option, then why not find small ways to integrate aspects of both faiths into your wedding?

Many couples often choose to have officiates from both of their faiths perform the ceremony and personalise their wedding by incorporating decorative detail and religious symbols and embellishments that have value and meaning to faiths from both sides of the family.

READ MORE: 4 things the mother of the bride should never do

3.  The racist cousin who is unfortunately related to your favourite aunt

Speak to your aunt beforehand and ask her to speak to your cousin. Because your aunt and cousin are a package deal. There’s no way you’re going to get out of this one, unless you’re prepared to a) not invite both and b) face the backlash afterwards.

The only thing you can do to minimise the possible damage he or she might cause, is to ensure that they get a seat as far away from your friends as possible.

Or, you can be the master of all trolls and ensure that your cousin is seated amongst your friends of the race your cousin is opposed to (of course, giving your friends a heads-up) for maximum discomfort. Jokes aside, your best bet would be to go with option one though, as this could backfire terribly.

This decision also depends on who is helping you to pay for the wedding. If you and your partner are footing the bill, then you can go ahead and gladly invite the aunt without the cousin.

WATCH: 6 People You Shouldn't Invite To Your Wedding!

Have you ever had to invite someone you didn’t want at your wedding? How did you deal with it? Share your stories with us.

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