Many people are dying in loneliness and empty relationships

2013-12-23 08:45

There are a lot of people suffering from a loss of sense of genuine true love, community, identity, and continuity. These losses all contribute to a deteriorating sense of deep personal well-being.

The increasing deep sense of personal loneliness, rootless nature emerging in modern society provides a fresh, and to me a fascinating perspective for assessing the soul of the modern human being. History shows that community life has been a source of vitality and stable life. Rooted in community life people developed a deep sense of shared experience and friendship that was genuine and full of trust.

But now in the society that is emerging fast and furious there is a general shattering of that deep friendship and genuine trust. What we get is groups of people calling themselves friends because they happen to meet over drinks and braai, or some social gathering. In such groups or friendships there is no real heartfelt connection among people. And so the lives of people become nasty, solitary, lonely and brutish. No wonder there is such deplorable superficiality of living; superficiality of male-female relationships and so on. It is anybody’s business society.

There are even worse cases where people live in the same house, same room and even bed and yet are psychologically wide apart; the case of so near yet so far. Alas! that it should be so. Alas! that human loving relationships today are not truly genuine are lasting but just creation of a maudlin sentimentality. Alas!

We are confronted with a society that is coming apart at the seams. These can be looked into is various ways, but I would look only on two aspects. First there is numbing loneliness that happens by uprooting and rootlessness where people move again and again into strange locations. Although there are positive values in moderate change of places, but continual repeated change of places is bad and unsettling as the mind and heart does not have time to gravitate in deeper subconscious peace in deep human spiritual recesses.

But there is another sense of rootlessness even when one person or family remains in one place. As people increasingly live in new housing developments or multiple dwelling town-house villages, neighborliness is a lifeless thing. In such settlements people are living side by side in anonymity and are just cold strangers. It is the case of so near yet so far again. There is virtually no real glue that provides lasting durable bonding in such environments in a real heartfelt community that comforts the hearts through sense vitality.

Further we are seeing a sharp increase in people suffering deep alienation or just feeling adrift, which is having an impact on emotional, psychological and even physical health well being of people. People are living close to each other, talking on facebook, texting and phoning each other even coming together in cheerful conversations and social parties but still the reality is there – there is dark deep loneliness that can be felt despite the fostered cheerful shallow conversations. There is a sense of deep unease and psychological worry that makes friendship and neighborliness disoriented and lack vitality and charm. Nowadays you cannot expect pure help or heartily comforts from friends or neighbor.

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