We Love Them As They Are: Phat = Pretty Hot And Thick

2014-01-20 10:45

Most of us have all gone through the phase of being bullied (you are quite lucky if you haven't). As school's reopened last week, there are those pupils who weren't excited about going back to school - due to the fear of being bullied.

Many young boys and girls suffer being bullied in South Africa, but today I decided to focus on this form of bullying; Being overweight or being called 'fat'. I spoke to three of the most confident and bubbly 'fat' or plus size people I know. If there is one thing that I learned from them; it's confidence and class. You can insult them about their weight and call them all sorts of words, but they will still walk past you with a smile on their face -  giving you the "I'm better than you" look.

Meet, Mzamo (student), Sindi (actress) and Siphumelele (Business woman).

I asked them a few questions about their weight and how they deal with bullies. Read the Q&A below:

  • Do you ever wake up and wish you were skinny? 

Mzamo (22 years old): At times I do wish I were at a more moderate weight, not skinny per say because even though I am flexible at a more moderate 'Healthier' weight I would be more Flexible and most of all healthier.

Sindi (24 years old): No - but I do wish to lose some kilos. As much as I love my body, I value my life so I want to be healthy and continue being an inspiration.

Siphumelele (23 years old): Well no. I've never wished to be skinny, only skinnier meaning - I wud love to lose a bit of weight but not go from 50 to 28... Ppl will start talking {Laughs}

  • What's the meanest thing someone has ever said to you about your weight?

Mzamo:  I don't have the correct recollection of all the nasty things I've heard people say about my weight because I built myself a thick skin at an early age, but the general "fatty boom boom" childhood insults were never given much response, I do though remember one time a friend insulted me in the park we always used to walk through from school, I can't remember the insult but I was in grade 3 I punched his face and his tooth came out hahahahaha, in my adulthood the most recent was a guy who screamed out from a bus (can you believe it) he said "kodwa usakwazi ukuzigeza nje?" which means can you still even bath yourself?. I had no response I really thought of shouting an insult back but I felt I'd be dragging myself down to such a classless level.

Sindi: I chose not to allow people to be mean to me, my confidence and bubbly persona radiates in a way that there's no room for negativity from people. I laugh when people tease me.

Siphumelele: Eish, I hear mean things every single day hey, but I think the meanest was when I was walking with my friend (guy friend) at a mall and I guess they thought we were dating. Some girls were walking behind us saying stuff like "awubuke umfana omuhle kangaka, ulfunani leliFurumba" (such a handsome guy, what's he doing with this fat girl), let's walk into Clicks and buy her Herbex"... That destroyed me and I cried. A lot. I didn't respond, I don't usually respond. My mother once told me never to argue with or entertain fools becouse people won't tell the difference. Cripple someone's ego but karma knows every address.

  • Have you ever went on some crazy diet hoping to lose weight?

Mzamo: I've went on plenty diets! Since childhood! The thing though is not to go on a diet, I've realized, the thing is to go onto a new life style program cause a "diet" has an end date and even when you've lost the weight cause the end date has come, gradually you go back to your old weight and even extra kilos.

Sindi: No.

Siphumelele: YES!!! Most of the time I'm forced. Last year I used lipo injections that suck up fat. It costed me about R5550, 00 (if I remember correctly). You go and get injected where you want to lose weight once a week for about 5 weeks, then you  have to cut down on many other foods and exercise, a lot.

  • You message to young girls and boys who are bullied everyday at school about their weight?

Mzamo: Look, its not okay to be overweight, I'm not taking part in this survey to say "eat and don't mind" but nobody chooses to have a slow metabolism or an aggressive appetite. Nobody has the right to make a child's life miserable because they are bigger than what you feel they should be! Build a thick skin! Block out those insults! And do not! Carry them into your future cause that will eat your confidence away! Yes there are some people who are just genetically shy, but don't let it be caused by peoples insults! Be active! Play and do the things the other kids can do! I wish I were more active on the sports side when I was growing up. As well, parents need to adopt a healthy lifestyle at home. My mom and dad tried they're means to help me loose weight and at times I did, but 'diets have an end date' and it certainly isn't easy when there are chips, sweets and ice cream in the house. Kids need to be active! I myself am on a new lifestyle program cause I want health. But Never. Never lose your joy because 'Tom' is thinner than you; You are just as good as 'Tom'. Prove you can do everything he can do and more!

Sindi: You teach people how to treat you. We have to learn to accept who we are and work with it. Stop pondering on the acceptance from people who are of this world. Look beyond your physical appearance and you'll see how much God loves you - after all you are God's masterpiece created for a purpose and destiny.

Siphumelele: Do you! It is important for you to knw who you are, where you come from and where you are going. It's not every person who is big that stuffs their faces but many people don't understand or are not informed of that. Focus on you and what you want for yourself. Someone once said; our lives are like the freeway, each person being the driver of their own vehicle. People who insult and bully you are like tollgates on the freeway (you will come across them in life, a lot) so all you need to do is pay your due and pass

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